Chain Reaction

I went to a meeting last night at one of our local high schools that was a parent session for a program that is being implemented in most of our district. It was absolutely the most amazing program I have ever attended. The program is called "Rachel's Challenge". The program was started by Darrell Scott. His daughter, Rachel Joy Scott, was the first child to die at Columbine High School, April 20, 1999. After her death, her parents found 6 diaries and an essay written by Rachel that detailed her theory that acts of kindness and compassion will start a chain reaction of the same. Her story and the program that her family started in her memory are so much more than this. This meeting had a profound effect on me. I urge you to have "Rachel's Challenge" come in to your schools and talk to your children. I can't do it justice here--I could but the blog entry would be a mile long--but trust me you will be floored!

So the question is...Why is it so hard to just be kind? Not to toot my own horn but I have always taught my children that if I ever learn of them picking on someone they will be in the worst trouble of their lives. I think that this stems from having been a victim of teasing as a child (being called "Fat Fat Water-rat" and "Two Ton Toni" does nothing for the psyche) and also from having been the target of some "mean girls" in high school. This topic has always been near and dear to my heart. But in recent years I have added a requirement to the "no bullying" rule. That addition is to stand up for others who can't stand up for themselves. It is not enough to be kind to others, though it is an excellent start, you also have to have zero tolerance for other kids being treated poorly. I never picked on anyone but I never stood up for anyone either. Not that a person has to right all of the world's wrongs but just being kind and compassionate is a fine place to start.

This has an interesting tie in to my office. At one point a couple of years ago, we were talking about the kids that we see and how some of them have some issues whether they were problem patients or the kids who may be labeled as "socially awkward". Dr. P brought up an interesting point. To paraphrase, he said that the way we treat kids with kindness is so important because for some kids this may be the only time of their day that they are treated kindly and positively. To me that is a profound statement. How can your trip to the orthodontist be the only time of the day that you are treated well? I fear though,that in some kid's life, it's true. That's sad. Think about that the next time you deal with a kid. Are you making a positive impact on that child's life? Are you setting a good example by your actions and words?

It is hard to be kind sometimes. Remember that someone has something going on all the time. Someone is having a bad day. If you are having a bad day then say so. Don't be afraid to say, "I am having a bad day. Can you help me?" Some moms come in to the office all the time like they flew in on a broomstick, all demanding and mean. Just say that you are having a bad day--we'll do our best to make your experience at our office a positive one. Small acts of kindness can make all the difference in someone's day.

With all the recent media attention on school bullying, from the suicide of Phoebe Prince to the more recent suicides of Tyler Clementi and other young boys, I have been pretty fired up about this topic. I have become aware of "The Trevor Project", a suicide hotline, and the "It Gets Better" campaign that shows videos of adults telling gay youth to hang in there because it gets better. Now to have been exposed to "Rachel's Challenge" I am pretty much bursting with emotions and ideas. We can make the world a better place. I know it. We just have to get on board and care enough to be kind and compassionate and be the type of people that we want our children to be.

Rachel Joy Scott died April 20, 1999. Her funeral had the largest viewing audience in CNN history. In the 11 years since her death, her ideas have reached thousands and thousands of people.  She wrote that she would impact the world. She also wrote that she would die young. Had she not died--her diaries would not have been read. Her casket was covered in signatures and her dad wrote that her death would not be in vain. Mission accomplished.

I feel as though I haven't said enough, maybe i've said too much. I don't know. What I do know is that I am accepting "Rachel's Challenge". I will look for the best in others, I will dare to dream, I will choose positive influences, I will use kind words and I WILL start a chain reaction. I truly hope you will too.


For more information on "Rachel's Challenge", visit www.rachelscott.com
For more information on "The Trevor Project", visit www.thetrevorproject.org